I’m interested in someone in my art class who’s an atheist. He just asked me out and I wanted to say yes, but I said "I’ll think about it" since he doesn’t know I’m a Christian. I’m not sure if I should say yes and tell him that I’m a Christian. When I dated some atheists in the past, they weren’t respectful to me or my religion and they tried their best to pull me away from Christianity.
If you’re a Christian that have been in a relationship (whether dating or marriage) with an atheist, did it work out well? Tell me your experience(s).
Since I’m interested in this guy, I just want to move on and forget about the guy I’ve been in love with for five years who already has a girlfriend (if you’re curious about it, check out my other questions).
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July 10th, 2010 at 8:41 am
As long as you guys don’t get into a too heated discusssion about religion you’ll be fine.
July 10th, 2010 at 8:41 am
they shouldnt have been, Paul said to not be equally yoked with an unbeliever.
July 10th, 2010 at 8:41 am
All the really hot women I’ve had in bed were Christians.
July 10th, 2010 at 8:41 am
I’m an atheist, have always been up front about it if I sense a relationship coming on. I explain I’m not out to change anybody’s mind, so can we have coffee and talk about something else?
Works fine most of the time.
July 10th, 2010 at 8:41 am
I’ll tell you right now — and really, I’m not sure I would have listened to my own advice given the whirlwind of pheromones I was enjoying when I was dating my now husband — it is lonely being the only adult worshiper in the house. It is lonely to bring the kids with me to church alone when he sits at home. The other thing is –I wonder what it would be like to have a *spiritual* aspect of marriage with my husband, one in which we could actually share in the mystery and awe of God. I’m not saying don’t consider this guy — who knows, he may discover God through you, but just define your dating goals ahead of time, and stick to them.
July 10th, 2010 at 8:41 am
Staci,
BEFORE you go on a date you should speak with him about your beliefs so that he will know that you are a Christian and then speak with him about how he feels about that and whether he will be able to respect your beliefs and whether you will be able to respect his. This must be a two-way street. Neither of you should be pushing the other. Respect of one another’s beliefs is very important in any relationship even if it "JUST FRIENDSHIP". I was not a Christian and neither was my wife when we were married but we both studied and became Christians after 10 years of marriage (more or less). We have been married since 1975 and I have been the most blessed man in this world! Have a great weekend.
Thank You,
Eds
EDIT:
I have been and will remain faithful to her until death we do part.
.
July 10th, 2010 at 8:41 am
He was an agnostic, and no, it didn’t work out. He wanted to marry me but I would not marry a non-Christian because I knew this was against what God had commanded. Because of this he tirelessly argued with me, emailing me article after article about how Christianity wasn’t true.
I loved him. It broke my heart not to be able to be with him. It still breaks my heart a little and I’m now happily married.
I would advise all women who are starting to date someone who is not a Christian to leave that alone. It is now seven years later, and I am happily married, and it still hurts sometimes. Please don’t play with that kind of fire. Guard your heart.
July 10th, 2010 at 8:41 am
If you’re a Christian….
….would you rather be married to an atheist law-abiding citizen, or a Christian who is an ex-con and a criminal?
….would you rather be married to an atheist who loved and respected children, or a Christian in who was a closet child abuser?
…would you rather be married to an atheist who was hard-working, self-supporting and responsible with money, or a Christian who lived beyond his means and had enough income tax liabilities and credit card debt to chock a horse?
July 10th, 2010 at 8:41 am
I’m an atheist, but my previous relationship was with a Christian. It work out well, we broke up for different reasons.
Just, eh, it can only work if you respect each other’s views. He can come to church with you, just as you can go to a sports game with him. Same thing.
We never tried to convert each other, in fact, we found out that most our views on life are basically the same. The main difference between an atheist and a Christian is the view on the afterlife. I couldn’t have been with her, if she had "warned" me about hell all the time. She couldn’t have been with me, if I told her "she’d end up in a coffin and that’s it" all the time.
If you can avoid the afterlife, or least respect each other’s views on it, there’s not really a problem.
Any relationship only works if the two respect each other’s views. And that goes for views on anything, not just religion.
July 10th, 2010 at 8:41 am
I was attracted to a woman who was a catholic, but never went to church. She didn’t tell me she was an atheist, but 2 years after the marriage she admitted it. I am LDS and go to church nearly every Sunday. For awhile she tried to convince me I was wasting my time and money. I didn’t think we were going to make it for about 3 years. Then we worked out an agreement that she didn’t need to try and fix me. I am not fixable. So now things are perfect and have been for 5 years.
It is a much better marriage than being married to an extremely jealous, mean, hot tempered Christian for 44 years. We have had that disagreement and a couple others, but we never raise our voices at each other and have not had a real argument in 8 years, only the main disagreement. I wouldn’t trade her for hardly any Christians that I know.
July 10th, 2010 at 8:41 am
God tells us to not be unequally yoked! That person can bring u down far faster than u can bring him up. Also, never enter a relationship thinking u can change someone. I have dated guys who were not Christians & it does not work. Some even went 2 church w/me. But believe me when I tell u to wait for that man of God. Men that honor God & follow him will not defile you. He will love God more than he loves you! And that is what u want……If he lives his life dedicated to not disobey God, then u will always be pleased w/him.
July 10th, 2010 at 8:41 am
I’m an atheist. My wife is Catholic and goes to church. We are happily married and have three kids, but we still have our differences.
My kids go to church with my wife quite regularly and have evening classes there as well. Once I decided to tell my kids my point of view, saying that I don’t believe in god, etc. But my wife got angry with me and actually accused ME of brain-washing the kids! I have (calmly) told them my point of view a couple of times, whereas the church is allowed to bombard them for hours with absurd fairy tales and I am the one who is brain-washing. It just shows how ingrained religious sentiment is, especially when you learn it young.
July 10th, 2010 at 8:41 am
mine didn’t work out. i was married to him. he and i always butted heads about religion. we fought about it constantly! he was abusive, that’s why i divorced him, but IMO, it doesn’t work, mixing religions. the bible says, "don’t be unequally yolked". i mean, if you both aren’t "practicing" religion, it shouldn’t be a big deal. jmo.